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Pantyhose Craft Week: Part IV
Used pantyhose can also make great dolls. Especially if your children aren’t that particular.
Who needs Cabbage Patch Kids when you can have…um…Pantyhose Face Kids?
Of course, not all dolls are for children. If you know what we mean…..
Some dolls are for adults.
Very disturbed adults.
Posted by Mary on March 30, 2006 | Permalink
Comments
Will the horror of the pantyhose crafts never end!!!!
I guess when you have a lot of something, and a lot of time on your hands, bad things happen.
Posted by: SageHen | Mar 30, 2006 2:05:55 PM
why do those 3 in the hoods have penis noses? really, i'm so disturbed but yet i keep returning. wrong, it's just so wrong.
Posted by: Inky | Mar 30, 2006 2:23:58 PM
Penis noses!!! My thought's exactly.
What is with bath-tub guy? Was Jim Henson experimenting with some really strong pharmaceuticals??
Where is his panty hose rubber ducky? And, no chest hair? What about pubes??
Posted by: toiletpaper | Mar 30, 2006 2:30:58 PM
penis noses? then they must be proboscis monkeys escaped from the zoo, cleverly disguised as hags.
me wants to know how detailed they go with the fella underneath the washrag. reminds me of an all nude knitted suit avec les bits nautés
Posted by: ihateToast | Mar 30, 2006 3:14:35 PM
The ones with the penis noses look like the Druid branch of the ass-faced family from South Park.
Posted by: Marcia | Mar 30, 2006 3:35:12 PM
These are really starting to scare me! That clown from Poltergeist isn't looking so bad anymore...
Posted by: Laurie | Mar 30, 2006 4:04:38 PM
there is a store in town that has those dance hall pantyhose wimmins in it and even worse theyre life size and scary
Posted by: d34dpuppy | Mar 30, 2006 6:02:32 PM
Geez! Back when I was a little kid there was a brief craze of these things called "Kitchen Witches" which, I now realize, were pantyhose dolls! Creepy!
My aunt had one hanging in her kitchen window, next to the Spider-plant and a little bottle filled with various strata of colored sand (what was with all the crafts-y stuff in the 70's)?
Posted by: Inky | Mar 30, 2006 6:19:51 PM
well, well, well...looks to me like we have three different scenerios going on here....first, you have the three wise men looking like penis's in drag, then,second, you have two of the witches of eastwick and martha washington,(looking a little out of place i must say), and they're having having a picnic!!, ...third, you have meryl strep in an angel suit looking a little squished somehow, and fourth and last, we have rob claymation reiner reading a script and posing for the picture....all of which have nothing what so ever to do with crafts........... and ain't that grand?
Posted by: tulip flower | Mar 30, 2006 6:25:12 PM
I think some place there is a lost episode of "The Twilight Zone" about these scary people.
Posted by: Wendy | Mar 30, 2006 8:23:19 PM
the top photos remind me of foreskin people, not pantyhose peeps.
Posted by: momolo | Mar 30, 2006 8:25:49 PM
gah!!!! make the baaaaaad crafty childhood memories STOP!!!! This is one distrubed adult right here - I had managed to push those sunny childhood days spent indoors making pantyhose people (and puppies - oh the shame) to the farthest reaches of my memory but now... it has all come flooding back to me like a well tended maiden hair fern cascading out of a finely wrought macrame plant hanger... come to think of it, I also used to make macrame people with pantyhose faces... now there was a winning combination!!!
Posted by: mel | Mar 30, 2006 8:35:50 PM
they look like little teensy tiny penises on top of enlarged testes. i think i just threw up a little in my mouth looking at them.
Posted by: Kathryn | Mar 30, 2006 9:10:22 PM
Those aren't penis-noses! Those are the southern end of northbound puppy dogs headfirst in the laundry!
Posted by: Allen | Mar 30, 2006 9:10:36 PM
The mouthless wonders at the top left look like the animated monks in "Monty Python and the Holy Grail". I'm sure if you flipped one upside down it would have a perfect bum crack ;-)
Posted by: desiree | Mar 30, 2006 10:49:31 PM
OMIGOD - I have this book!! I instantly recognised the bathtub man - I thought this was the best book I'd ever seen - way back then - in a galaxy far far etc....
Posted by: Erica | Mar 31, 2006 2:16:33 AM
OMGi - pantyhose craft week has just lifted me out of a severe slump. Next time I have panic attack I will think of the dolls and the blind people mirrors and laugh myself to death instead!
Posted by: Abi | Mar 31, 2006 3:38:50 AM
AUGH! It burns, it burns! My eyes!! AUGH!!
Posted by: Yorkie | Mar 31, 2006 3:52:35 AM
he he he... My grandmother use to have a Mr & Mrs Claus (of the Santa sort) made like these!! I had forgotten how aweful they were!!
Posted by: Heather Wolff | Mar 31, 2006 10:10:28 AM
you, too, can have your very own scrotum nativity set. Instructions inside.
ewwww. even writing that made me cringe.
Posted by: beastarzmom | Mar 31, 2006 11:49:28 AM
Always hated those dolls. But pantyhose fun week is great! I really want the colored room divider for when I get around to building that opium den (definitely keep the dolls out of the opium den).
Next, we need to find patterns for used necktie fun week! One of my favorites came from when everything went "mod" and ties went from pencil-thin to wider than your face. My friend's Mom found a pattern to turn all those hundreds of useless old stockbroker ties into a fun 'n fabulous hostess skirt, "maxi-style." And last time I asked she still had it.
Posted by: Ashphalt | Mar 31, 2006 12:16:16 PM
"Always hated those dolls. But pantyhose fun week is great! I really want the colored room divider..."
You know, the more I think about the pantyhose room dividers filled with embroidery hoops and golf balls, the more I think that getting from room-to-room in a place decorated like that is, at the very least, annoying, and perhaps life-threatening should you, say, run quickly to answer the phone and get your nose hooked in a hoop or catch a golf ball to the forehead.
Posted by: Inky | Mar 31, 2006 12:32:55 PM
i had an actual BLANKET made out of scratchy ties. I wonder... would there be a 'pantyhose' blanket? there must be...
Posted by: tictic | Mar 31, 2006 12:50:46 PM
ah-ha! for a pantyhose blanket, you stuff each leg with clothes-dryer lint, then sew them together side by side to make a duvet! wow, i am a GENIUS! anyone out there want to buy one??
Posted by: tictic | Mar 31, 2006 12:53:32 PM
I'd buy one Tictic, but I might worry about sleeping under it while too near the open flame of all those 70's-era sculpted candles:
http://images.amazon.com/images/P/B0002XRBBQ.01-A247K04AGBARJM.MZZZZZZZ.jpg
Posted by: Inky | Mar 31, 2006 1:22:29 PM
I think those dolls would look much better with pantyhose dredlocks. Scroll down to the bottom of this page for photos and instructions:
http://www.diynet.com/diy/cr_dolls/article/0,2025,DIY_13753_2268199,00.html
By the way, I think the bathtub guy looks like Dr. Phil.
Scary!
Posted by: Sputnik | Mar 31, 2006 3:03:09 PM
OH MY GAWD!!! It is Dr. Phil in the tub......GAG!!! And here I was wondering about pubes.....I'm so going to go scrub my brain now.....I figure a LOT of Captain Morgan should help with that. Help me Captain, your my only hope!!
Posted by: toiletpaper | Mar 31, 2006 3:35:55 PM
Ick Ick Ick it IS Dr. Phil!
I feel a Phil-ism quote coming on:
"You don't need pepper spray to pluck your pubes."
Posted by: cp | Apr 1, 2006 7:25:15 PM
Captain Morgan, Dr. Phil indeed, who are you people anyway? You ought to be ashamed of yourself. Your language makes me wonder about what kind of panties you wear, probably animal print thongs. I think these 70’s pantyhose cuddlers are adorable, especially the 3 puppy dogs, that some of you sexually frustrated wimmens are calling wise men. I just went out to the Goodwill and bought 10 pairs of old panthose so I could make some all by myself, you’ll see, you dirty mouth freaks, you’ll see, when Crafters Magazine features them on their cover! In full color. You’ve guessed it almost right, you foul mouth nasty wimmens, about the ones that look like northbound puppies head first inthe laundry, only the sticking-out things are not tails they are hemorrhoids. Get a grip! I’d like to report you to the interned dirty language police. But you do make me laugh a lot! So all is forgiven. Daffy Crafty
Posted by: Daffy Crafty | Apr 2, 2006 10:22:19 AM
Captain Morgan Rules!!!! And, just so you will know, there are abso-freakin-lutley is no animal print butt floss on me!!! Clean enough for your ever senstitive ears?? If not, tuff ca-ca!! Hemorroids indeed!!
Posted by: toiletpaper | Apr 3, 2006 3:24:12 PM
Lordy!
*snort!*
Posted by: severina | Apr 8, 2006 7:47:07 PM
The butt-faced ones get creepier every time I look at them.
WHY would anyone make butt-faced Druids?
Posted by: severina | Apr 8, 2006 9:28:47 PM
Have you ever used thick Black 60/70 denier opaque nylon Tights..? you can usually find plenty of old ones from your local school that the girls have left behind.
Posted by: elizabeth | Apr 24, 2006 4:50:37 PM
Anybody else think of The Village?
Posted by: Cherry | May 29, 2006 7:12:09 PM
Oh lord. My grandmother owned the book with the pantyhose bathtub man in it. I believe it was called "How To Make Soft Toys And Dolls." (Yes! There are four copies for sale on Amazon! Whee!) Oh, I thought that book was the coolest thing ever. It's really quite terrifying to think about how those photos are burned indelibly into my brain, taking up valuable memory. Yipe.
Posted by: Kara | Jan 19, 2007 4:43:09 PM
