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Threadbared: Up To Date On All The Current Fashions.
Linda waits and waits for fall
Her clothes are ready, no need for the mall
This year fashion statements will be a breeze
As soon as the temperature drops below 85 degrees
The money's spent, no turning back
Navajo print...it's the new black.
Posted by Mary on September 7, 2006 | Permalink
Comments
Where does Linda end and the wall begin?
Posted by: toiletpaper | Sep 7, 2006 11:12:00 AM
I'm not sure, but those patterns seem to be competing for control of her face.
Maybe she's Chameleon Woman?
Posted by: Ashphalt | Sep 7, 2006 11:49:11 AM
the only place not covered is her frost-bitten face, poor thing!
Posted by: Kathryn | Sep 7, 2006 12:43:19 PM
"Maybe she's Chameleon Woman?"
The first prototype of the Mary Tyler Moore line of Photo-Interactive Camouflage Combat Wear® seemed to be working perfectly until an unfortunate trip to a southwestern craft fair caused the unit to overheat and explode, killing the test subject and three Kachina doll vendors.
Posted by: Inky | Sep 7, 2006 12:57:25 PM
Ouch! If a wild design combination could induce migraines, this would be the primary culprit. I'll have to take Imitrex every time I see this pic!
Posted by: Desiree | Sep 7, 2006 2:15:50 PM
This looks a bit like the outfit Lloyd wears in Dumb and Dumber. The one where he gets all gussied up to go out on the date!
Posted by: Deborah | Sep 7, 2006 2:37:58 PM
Holy smoke signals, Chamelion Woman, wool, wool everywhere! I mean, did you break into an Indian gift shop or what? Do you suppose Linda has secret plans to make everyone in her little family a beautiful coat with a great big white-trimmed collar and patch pockets to match hers? Can't you just picture this red, black and yellow wool-family strolling down the street together on a cold and snowy day? You'll never loose these kinds of people in a blizzard. Hang on to your hats kids!
Posted by: JuJu | Sep 7, 2006 4:51:00 PM
Deborah - that's exactly what my husband said too!
And then he walked around our house the rest of the morning and saying, "Big gulps, huh? Cool. All right! Well, see ya later." :)
Posted by: Mary | Sep 7, 2006 9:07:42 PM
From the mouth of my 7-year old DS.
"Is that a Halloween costume?"
Me,
"Yep, she's going trick or treating in the ever popular costume "bedding for a ski lodge."
Posted by: SageHen | Sep 7, 2006 11:11:59 PM
Sure seems like a coat so warm looking would have at least ONE button! Are they depending on that paper thin sash to keep it closed...my o my....
Posted by: ellie | Sep 8, 2006 12:36:29 AM
Classic example of camouflage. The puffed up collar, confusing patterns and held up right hand all draw the eye away from the left arm. But take a second look. That's not an arm at ALL but a loathesome snake swalllowing it's blanket wrapped prey (shudder)!
Posted by: professor | Sep 8, 2006 12:51:40 AM
Speaking of arms, isn't it uncanny how her left arm is poised in classic 'cell phone' pose...
Posted by: barb | Sep 8, 2006 1:36:44 AM
Arrgh!
My dorm lobby in college had that same wallpaper, except it was rust orange instead of crimson in the background!
"Navajo people, Navajo tribe.
So proud to live, So proud to die! (or was that "dye"?)"
Posted by: Allen | Sep 8, 2006 9:24:01 AM
ooh, I just love the way it makes her hips look about 3 sizes bigger than her top...must be the teepee effect she's going for...
Posted by: ms nosy | Sep 8, 2006 11:32:51 AM
Allen - the color was actually "Burnt Orange." There was also Harvest Gold and Avocado Green. The wallpaper that haunts me was avocado green with brown medalions. Uuuugly. What were we thinking??
Posted by: | Sep 8, 2006 3:27:06 PM
I like how the boots don't really go with the rest of the motif. It's as though the art director said:
"Hmmm... plain brown suede boots? Nah, not BUSY enough. Hey! Have her throw on these crazy-quilt mukluks! And hell, have her toss on this crochet cap my nanna knitted me while we're at it. It's, like, all pattern-y and stuff..."
Posted by: Inky | Sep 8, 2006 4:05:26 PM
I'm sorry, was there someone in that picture? That picture could be classified as seizure-inducing.
Posted by: Laurie | Sep 8, 2006 4:59:11 PM
This is just one case in thousands of late-stage ski-resortitis. Remember, these people can not help themselves after the first attack, the illness progessing until all the senses atrophy, causing colorblindness, hysteria, and enoromous bank account hemoraging, not to mention the untold damage to friends and family. Please call our hot-lines now to lend your support - no amount is too small in the fight against this debilitating disease.
Posted by: infantkittensyringe | Sep 8, 2006 11:14:11 PM
I happen to bring up this page whilst my 3 yo was standing next to me...he pointed at the above pic and started laughing his head off, saying, "That's silly, Mummy!"
The ID-ing of fug training does start early...
Posted by: Yorkie | Sep 9, 2006 3:20:58 AM
Navajo-riche...
Posted by: anonymous | Sep 9, 2006 9:45:29 AM
Is it just me - or does she only have three fingers on her right glove?
Posted by: Melanie | Sep 9, 2006 8:05:49 PM
How cold does it have to get in order to need gloves that thick anyway? And what on earth can you do while wearing thick stiff fingers warmers like that? Nothing but pose for patterns I think...just another design hoax perpetrated upon the fasion frenzied public of the frozen north...trying to create a trend just to make quick bucks. I hope the fashion doesn't catch on. It would make crocheting in public a little bit difficult.
Posted by: Daffy | Sep 10, 2006 1:15:14 PM
Okay all you fellow fasion aficionados, tell me, how does one get in and out of a belt like that? And is it just me, or does it seem kinda wide? It would have to be pretty sturdy and thick to hold up the bulk and weight of the coat fabric. Where do you see the necessary belt fastener? No buckle in sight. Does it fasten with hidden hook-and-eye fasteners? Try to hook those suckers on with those gloves on. Worse yet try to get those real fingers to work right after taking off a pair of gloves like that. Does the belt tie in a great big knot or bow in the back? Or is someone standing behind Coat woman holding on to the ends of the belt like a horse in a harness? Woah Coat Woman woah. Stand still right here woman and have yer pitcher took....and we can giddy-up-and-go for them there hot looking stallions, you know, the ones over yonder on the wool farm.
Posted by: underwaterblues | Sep 10, 2006 7:58:38 PM
have yer pitcher took....and then we can giddy-up-and-go for them there hot looking stallions, you know, the ones over yonder on the wool farm.
(squze me, my typo, I left out the word then.)
Posted by: underwaterblues | Sep 10, 2006 8:03:34 PM
It must be way cold where she's at; you will notice that her leggings end at her ankles, and below that she appears to have nothing but stumps for feet.
Posted by: Kathryn | Sep 10, 2006 9:05:18 PM
What a horrible desecration of a perfectly good Pendleton blanket.
Posted by: KarenK from the OR Coast | Sep 11, 2006 7:28:40 PM
Weirdbabe? How's come you stopped blogging? Was it something I said?
Posted by: shelley Noble | Sep 12, 2006 1:36:13 AM
Clearly a tribal wedding dress. Makes me think of this Apache Wedding song. Or something.
Now you will feer no rain,
for each of you will be shelter to the other.
Now you will feel no cold,
for each of you will be warmth for the other.
Now there is no loneliness for you;
now ther is no more loneliness.
Now you are two bodies,
but there is only one life before you.
Go now to your dwelling place
and enter into your days together.
And may your days be good
and long upon the earth.
RST
Posted by: | Sep 12, 2006 6:48:21 PM
I think she's trying to give the photographer the finger but those thick gloves won't bend.
Posted by: sea | Sep 12, 2006 9:56:07 PM
Follow the bouncing snow ball and sing along with me:
O give me a home where the buffalo roam
and the deer and the antelope play,
where seldom is heard a discouraging word
because the sounds are muffled by wool
O home, home on the range
where the ladies they dress very strange,
where blankets are used
to scare off the dudes
and lets have another little drinky and
sew up another big warm coat... hic...yes...another
dirink would be fime, flime, fine, just fine, shrine, hic.
Posted by: JuJu | Sep 13, 2006 12:03:27 AM
She's not wearing thick gloves, she has a malady called Disney Fingers.
Posted by: severina | Sep 14, 2006 9:57:29 PM
And the whole thing is made from no-sew fleece!
Posted by: k.a. | Sep 16, 2006 12:39:04 AM
No-sew fleece with the edging hot-glued on!
Posted by: severina | Sep 16, 2006 9:36:42 PM
i always wondered what they meant in nature shows when they said that zebra patterns break up the form and you can't see an individual in a herd. Or you can't if you're a peckish lioness. Now I get it. I can see her face, but can't find her. She should live in the wild this way. No way would the lions find her or sink their teeth into all that woven crap.
Posted by: Katy Cassidy | Sep 17, 2006 4:51:41 PM
Holy smoke signals indeed. This is yet another blatant example of cultural sabotage.
But let's try to be more positive, people. The Res. Trading Post that this woman invaded is filled with beautiful Hopi and Navaho blankets, representing thousands of years of wonderful culture, and hundreds of hours of excellence in craftsmanship.
The colors are awesome, all natural dyes. The designs are exquisite. The weight and texture of the wool are luxurious. Blankets like these are given in sacred ceremonies as gifts to honor special people. Hand woven ones cost upwards of $2,500.each on eBay depending on size.
Did anybody truly see and appreciate all of that? No. And that’s just what Chameleon Woman intended to happen as she stood there in her knock-off hideous acrylic fleece, hastily put together garment(glue-gunned indeed!)as she brazenly planted herself right in front of the real hand woven deals with the intent to dominate the cultural scene in her flamboyant fakery. Next thing you know it, she will be sporting a cradle board on her back and feathers (like that girl Tiffany in the other pattern profiling herself in her attention getting feather head-piece. )
And we give them brazen little hussies exactly what they want …attention. Even though we give them negative attention, they love it because we no longer talk about the real beautiful things in the real nice blanket show.
I vote we just ignore these pesky little intruders. Like big smelly phlarts in church.
Oh, did I just say that? Let me apologize and leave this cultural extravaganza and hide under my own little Pendelton blankie and puke out of my ears.
Posted by: ojibwa sal | Sep 17, 2006 8:32:52 PM
If those are $2,500. blankets I'll eat Chaneleon's leather gloves, both of them.
Posted by: Iz4u | Sep 26, 2006 4:25:37 PM
This reminds me of the hotel where I work. They have the ugliest carpeting I've ever seen, a wild pattern in hideous colors of rust, brown, puke green, dark blue, and some god-awful mustard yellow. The sitting area has still another ugly carpet pattern, and the furniture is upholstered in a competing pattern, and they all clash and demand equal attention and the overall effect is confusing...just like this woman in her Indian/Eskimo/Aztec getup in front of the busy background decor.
Posted by: Lois | Oct 4, 2006 1:15:00 PM
